Michele Malkin's necromancer kit

Well, it's official. I was so impressed with Michele Malkins ability to speak for the dead I decided to scout out the internet in hopes of finding out how she's able to accomplish such amazing feats.

I stumbled across a necromancer kit for $19.95 +tax that includes all the necessary instructions to enable me to speak to,and consequently for the dead. Last night I conducted a short interview(reception was sporadic)with Dan Bullock,a former Marine who holds the distinction of being the youngest soldier killed in the Vietnam conflict. He was killed at the age of 15.

Hello Dan..Can you hear me?

I hear ya man,not to clearly, but I hear ya.

So, Dan, I guess you know what I want to talk about.

Sure Ygor. You got to remember I'm on the other side, and as they say, I've crossed the Jordan, so reading your mind doesn't present a challenge to me. However,I must point out that it's been something like 37 years since I stepped into glory and I've haven't been keepin' up with current events.

Well, Dan, are you aware that our current President has involved us into another conflict, this time in a Place called Iraq.

Yo, Ygor. Are you fuckin' jiving me? Of course I'm aware, we got bunches of motherfuckers showin' up from Iraq. As a matter of fact that guy Dilawar,the Afghani guy..you know the kid who was roundin' up his goats or driving a taxi..some shit like that.He showed up, and man, let me tell ya, they fucked that poor boy up.

Dan, my reception is growing weaker. I haven't got this channeling business completely down, at least not nearly as well as others, like Michele and her conversations with Casey. I'm going to cut it short for now and get back to the instruction manual. It's been nice talking to you and I hope we can connect again.

No problem, Ygor. I can dig it. I got lots to say so I also hope we can hook up again soon. But before ya go. I just want to let ya know that like that big old honky liberal, what's his name, said years ago at his brothers funeral...I don't want to be enlarged in death to more than I was in life.

http://www.virtualwall.org/db/BullockDx01e.jpg